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RFH 2010, Cover Stories, Colgate News

'gate Grad Says 'It Will Get Better'

Sun, Apr 17, 2011

A Colgate graduate and soon-to-be doctor spoke recently about his sexuality identity and offered advice to those struggling with the issue and with bullying.

"My whole life came crashing down," Jake Kleinman '07 said of the night he realized he was gay. In coming to terms with his homosexuality, Kleinman felt like his "all-American life" was in jeopardy -- from his circle of Colgate friends to his plans to become a doctor.

He spoke recently at the Colgate Bookstore, and for the first time in front of an audience, Kleinman told his story about coming out during his junior year of college.

He first made his story public last October in a YouTube video, which was transcribed and edited into an essay as part of the recently released book It Gets Better: Coming Out, Overcoming Bullying, and Creating a Life Worth Living.

The It Gets Better Project was launched by author Dan Savage and his partner, Terry Miller, in fall 2010 in response to the tragic suicides by lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and queer (LGBTQ) teens.

A medical student who is about to graduate from Tulane University, Kleinman didn't think much about his video until a friend informed him that it got more than 1,000 hits. When Savage contacted him to ask if he would be part of an upcoming book, Kleinman thought it was just going to be a little pamphlet.

Released March 22, the book is a collection of essays by more than 100 contributors, including Barack Obama, Ellen Degeneres, and David Sedaris. Last week, the book reached 16th on the New York Times Best Sellers list for hardcover nonfiction.

Although he was fortunate to find acceptance at Colgate, Kleinman was riddled with anxiety before coming out, so he understands the feeling of isolation that many LGBTQ adolescents experience. But by telling his college friends -- especially those who had previously told him that they would never be friends with a gay person -- he began the process of understanding.

Several friends have told Kleinman that his outspokenness has saved their own lives. "Just offering to be there for people can be so powerful and make such a difference," he said.

The truth of that statement rang true last night during the question-and-answer period when a high school freshman talked about being bullied to tears every day. "I can't take it anymore," he said, asking for advice.

Kleinman sat with the 15-year-old afterward and has been in contact with him since the event. "I gave him my promise that I would do all I could to support him in any way that I can," Kleinman said.

Source: Colgate

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